​Peaceful Mama Birth Services

Since Madden was born the relationship I had with her father ended. I spent some time being single and “finding myself”. I met Ken, an amazing man who is now my husband and we got pregnant with my now second daughter. After my first birth I was deathly afraid of having another big baby and having an episiotomy again. I also didn’t want another epidural since the last one brought so much pain that I still have to this day. I figured the only way to avoid that was a c-section. I wanted to go into labor naturally and then once I got to the hospital just head to the operating room. How I thought a giant cut through my uterus would be better than a small cut to my perineum I have no idea. I told my OB (the same one that delivered Madden) my plan and he was fine with it. Why wouldn’t he be? C-sections cost more!

Anyway! Since having Madden I have adopted a more holistic, organic lifestyle. We don’t take medications, we eat well, and we don’t use chemicals in our house or on our bodies. I began realizing my C-section plan totally goes against everything I believe in. I began researching and that led me to natural childbirth. I read ways to manage labor pain and even ways to avoid tearing. I came across Bradley Childbirth classes and fell in love with the program. Ken was 100% on board and we signed up right away!

We started classes when I was about 5 months along. They were so informative! What started to scare me was the mindset of the hospitals and their staff. I was so worried that they wouldn’t go for my natural birth plan and the last thing you want to do is fight with people during childbirth! One of the couples in our class was doing a homebirth with a midwife. I immediately went home and began researching. Never in my wildest dreams did I think I would ever consider having a homebirth. What if something goes wrong, what if my baby is in trouble, what if I hemorrhage. I went through every fearful scenario anyone could come up with. But reading the statistics and facts about homebirth I began to feel at ease. Our teacher gave us a few midwife contacts to interview. We went with the first and only midwife we met with. Kate seemed awesome. I ditched my OB and began my prenatal care with her.

I read tons of books, had so much fun in our classes, watched videos and documentaries. I was prepared and confident. I quickly realized that homebirth wasn’t something people thought highly of. I learned to just keep our birth plan to myself to avoid the negativity. My husband was on board and that was all I cared about. Every day I told myself that everything was going to go smoothly and quickly. There would be no problems. I am a firm believer in the power of positive thinking.

My due date came and went as many do. At 40 or 41 weeks I would get minor contractions for about an hour and then they would go away. This would happen every few days. I was starting to get frustrated. We had the birth pool, the birth kit, the shower curtain liner on the bed. We were ready. Why was she teasing me?

At the end of 41 weeks we did a membrane strip. I knew she would come when she was ready but I was fearful of going to 43 weeks. At that time, Kate was legally obligated to turn me over to the hospital and I definitely didn’t want that! The membrane strip did nothing. A few days went by and at 42 weeks we did another membrane strip and she tried this balloon do-hickey. We realized I had a lip on my cervix and that was likely causing the stop and go contractions. She couldn’t inflate the balloon due to the lip. She told me I needed to squat…a lot. That should fix the lip and get baby’s head in the right position. So I went home and for 2 days I squatted. And stimulated my nipples. Boy was that a sight to see! At 42 weeks 2 days there I was squatting and stimulating those nipples. I was getting frustrated and stressed out. I felt like the baby was never going to come. All my research and dreams of a homebirth would be shattered with a C-section. 43 weeks was rapidly approaching.

My midwife said castor oil was always an option if I wanted to try it but baby was going to come when baby was ready. I was desperate!  I took one dose of castor oil at about 1pm on Thursday Sept 12 2013. An hour later I had a contraction. 10 minutes later I had another one. And another one. I had my little contraction app on my phone to track these suckers. They started getting strong pretty fast. They got down to 7-8 min apart. A part of me wanted to tell my husband to come home from work and the other part of me was in major labor denial. I had been here before and they always disappeared, leaving us disappointed. At 4:00 my husband told me he was on his way home. By the time he got home (about 4:45) they were strong but still about 7-8 min apart. I had let my midwife know and she said to check in when they got down to 4-5 min apart. My husband grabbed us some dinner and at that point I couldn’t talk through contractions anymore. They were about 5-6 min apart and I was still in denial! My midwife text me at 7pm to see how I was doing. I gave her the update and she said she was going to come by to check on me.

 Kate arrived at my house at about 8pm. I was so happy to see her! I was managing my contractions well, just hanging out on my birth ball. She brought her stuff in and said she wanted to check me. At about 8:45 I was 6 cm and almost 100% effaced. And the lip was gone! Yay! All that squatting paid off. We figured we had some time and she told Ken to get the birth tub filled up while she called another mom who thought she was in labor. Once she showed up and checked me it was almost like a queue for my body to kick it into high gear. I was really feeling them now. I managed to make it down the hall to our bedroom where the birth pool was. Ken was just finishing up filling it and I was sitting on our bed. I got really cold all of a sudden and got a wave of nausea. Holy crap! Was I in transition already? I told him to stop what he was doing and help me. Up until that point I had been laboring on my own. I am somewhat of an independent person and like to handle pain by myself most of the time. But this was on a whole other level. I needed him. The contractions were right on top of each other. It seemed like they would never stop long enough for me to get up and get in the tub. Finally there was a small gap and I got in the water. The warmth felt so good. I was disappointed I had waited so long to get in! The contractions continued one on top of the other.

I had previously tested positive for Group B Strep and had chosen to do the Hibiclens method. It is a vaginal wash you do each hour during labor. Because I had been in denial about even being in labor I had not done any wash yet. My midwife could see that I was progressing quickly and suggested I get out and do a quick wash. I agreed that after the next contraction I would get out. The contraction came and with it an insane urge to push. There was no way I was moving! All of a sudden I was completely out of control. The pushing sensation was so strong I couldn’t control it. All of those sweet breathing techniques and meditation I had practiced went flying out the window. Animal instincts kicked in and I couldn’t control it. I was roaring like the mama tiger I am. I flashed back to my first birth and got so scared. I told everyone I didn’t want to push anymore. I think I even started crying. (All signs that the end is near!) They tried to get me focused and although I didn’t want to push, my body sure did. All of a sudden my water broke. A few pushes later her head was born! It was happening! And without an episiotomy. I didn’t have another urge to push for about a minute after that. As much of a relief as that was I got a little nervous because her head was in the water. Finally the urge came and out came my second baby girl. 10:30 pm on Thursday Sept 12, 2013. I did it. Naturally, powerfully. That was raw, beautiful birth. She was absolutely perfect.

There was quite a bit of blood in the water. We were afraid something may be wrong so they helped me out of the tub to try to work on getting my placenta out. I laid in bed for a minute to let more blood get to the baby from the cord, then we cut it. My husband did skin-to-skin with her and I headed to the bathroom. We thought sitting on the toilet would help the placenta come out. It did! What a cool thing to see! Definitely not for people with weak stomachs!

I went back to my bed and cuddled up with my little family. Kate examined me. It turns out the blood was from a second degree tear. Darn! She also informed me that she wasn’t comfortable stitching me up and was going to call another midwife who was more experienced with this kind of tearing. Really?! What is with my vagina? Can’t a girl catch a break? That’s not even the kicker. The second midwife that came ALSO didn’t feel comfortable stitching me up. Holy crap, what did this sweet little baby do to me?! They called in the queen midwife of southern California, literally. By this time it was about midnight. Makenzie was weighed and measured (which she hated!). She was a whopping 9lbs 6oz, 21 in. She beat her sister by 2oz. I was finally done being sewn back together, cleaned up and cuddling with my fresh little bundle around 2:30am. Although the 2nd degree tear part royally sucked, it was such an amazing night. I had a quick labor and a perfect baby. Exactly what I told myself would happen. The midwives cleaned everything up and were so helpful. I didn’t have to worry about a thing.

My recovery was so great with this delivery! It was so nice to be at home and not in a strange place. We didn’t have to put the baby in the car and travel anywhere. My tear healed so much faster than my episiotomy. I was on a birth high for months. Unfortunately, breastfeeding didn’t work out with this baby either. I still did not have the support I needed. I got to the 2 week mark with cracked, bloody, bruised nipples and a hungry baby. She would drain me and then pull away crying because she was still hungry. I know now that I was not eating nearly enough, maybe only 400 calories a day and not drinking nearly enough water. Also, the pain I was in was causing my body so much stress. All factors that throw off supply and the baby senses the stress. I gave up. I am still disappointed in myself to this day. But at the time I just couldn’t do it. Being pregnant again now, I plan on having another rockin’ homebirth. But my focus this pregnancy is to really educate myself on breastfeeding. I WILL successfully breastfeed my child.

Overall, it was such an amazing experience and one that has motivated me to educate other women on natural childbirth. Homebirth, birth center or hospital birth women CAN get the birth they want. Our bodies are so amazing.